Disabling Relics for Dummies 1st Edition by J B Trepagnier ISBN 108806406X 9781088064061

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Product details:
ISBN 10: 108806406X
ISBN 13: 9781088064061
Author: J B Trepagnier

There is a cornucopia of cursed objects from one of the most dangerous cults ever headed my way and I’ve never been more excited.

My twin sister, Ripley, says when your hot wolfy archaeologist exboyfriend, who likes to cosplay as Indiana Jones in the most non ironic way, shows up again, you do not add to cart. But he’s been doing digs in Norway and Ireland at the ruins of the site where one of the most dangerous cults ever met their end. He’s bringing me toys. Lots of nice, cursed toys.

One of these items is the most curious puzzle box. There are layers of curses to unravel to get to what’s inside. Maybe I’m stupid, but I’m dying to know what was so important to the Cult of the Aether Sisters that they stuck it in this box behind this much protection and buried it under ground.

Everyone is warning me not to. I should have listened.

Disabling Relics for Dummies 1st Edition Table of contents:

1. Introduction: So You Found a Cursed Relic

   • What not to touch (but you already touched it, didn’t you?)

2. Chapter 1 – Types of Magical Relics

   • Cursed, Blessed, Enchanted, and Just Plain Stubborn

   • How to tell what might explode and what might possess you

3. Chapter 2 – Tools of the Trade

   • Salt, sage, sigils, and sass

   • Ward gloves vs. holy tongs: what’s in your relic kit?

4. Chapter 3 – Breaking Bonds: How to Disarm a Relic Safely

   • Unbinding spells 101

   • What happens when it talks back?

5. Chapter 4 – Relics with Attitude

   • Dealing with sentient objects and overly dramatic curses

   • A relic once tried to marry me: a cautionary tale

6. Chapter 5 – The Profane Museum’s Protocol

   • What to do when you accidentally unleash a soul-eating pharaoh

   • Paperwork. So. Much. Paperwork.

7. Chapter 6 – When in Doubt, Lock It Up

   • Emergency containment rituals

   • Building a DIY vault from things you probably already stole

8. Appendix A – Latin Phrases You Should Definitely Not Say Out Loud

   • Because “Ignis Animarum” doesn’t mean “warm hugs”

9. Appendix B – Notes from the Last Intern Who Survived

   • Advice, complaints, and where they hid the good coffee

10. Acknowledgments (and Warnings)

• Thank you to my mentor, who’s still technically a frog

• If you’re reading this and the relic is glowing—RUN

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Tags: J B Trepagnier, Disabling Relics, Dummies